On Sleep

I’m not a scientific expert on sleep. I don’t fully understand REM, sleep cycles, serotonin, or all the chemical elements. I’ve never done an ECG, and I don’t wear a smartwatch to track my sleep. Still, I’ve slept every day for over 40 years, and raising three kids has given me a different perspective. I think we’re all expert practitioners, simply because we sleep regularly. Watching how my kids’ mood and behavior change with their sleep has shown me that mindset and everyday habits matter more than people realize.

1. Your Mileage May Vary

The American Academy of Sleep Medicine and studies from places like JAMA Internal Medicine offer guidelines: maintain schedules, avoid screens before bed, cut out caffeine late at night. These help many people, and I’m not against them. I’m just different. I trust my body and mindset more than a strict routine. I respect that others have different needs. Some people need more structure; some rely on substances or supplements. I just know that my approach works for me, and maybe more people could benefit from relaxing their rules and trusting their instincts.

2. Embracing Each Moment

I never get angry if I’m awake when I’d rather be asleep. If I can’t drift off right away, or if I wake up in the middle of the night, I see it as a moment for reflection and meditation. I’m not worried about forcing myself to sleep. If I need it, I trust it will come. This calm acceptance removes anxiety, which I believe is a big part of what keeps some people awake. Instead of focusing on coffee, stress, or routines, I focus on accepting my situation.

3. Siestas and Flexibility

I’ve spent months in Spain and Colombia, where siestas are a normal part of life. I embraced them and felt at home. When everyone around you supports resting in the afternoon—stores close, people slow down—your whole mindset shifts. Late dinners and socializing felt more natural because we’d napped. These experiences show that culture can support rest. It’s not just about your biology; it’s also about the environment, traditions, and social norms that make rest natural and welcomed.

4. Travel and Work

I spent seven years as a consultant, flying millions of miles, changing time zones often, and sometimes matching odd shift schedules for industries like mining, oil and gas, or manufacturing. I’d wake at 3 a.m., sleep at 6 or 7 p.m., and I don’t recall struggling with jet lag once I got used to it. I’d arrive somewhere, sleep when I was tired, and adapt quickly. Maybe it’s epigenetics, maybe it’s habit, but I never saw time zones or odd hours as a big deal. I think if you trust your body and go with the flow, you learn to adjust naturally.

5. Children

Having kids teaches you to adapt. Newborns don’t follow clocks. Instead of trying to enforce a schedule, I treated it like a sleep competition: whenever my baby slept, I would sleep too, no matter the time of day. This lets both parents and kids stay more rested, and removes the stress of forcing a fixed bedtime. The same mindset applies to work. If I wake up tired, I might skip a meeting. Why show up exhausted and unfocused? Meetings should be productive and engaging, not an obligation you attend half-asleep.

6. Diet

I don’t have a habit of drinking coffee or alcohol. I don’t rely on substances like melatonin for sleep. Instead, I tend to eat what’s generally considered healthy—almonds, salmon, blueberries, oranges, sweet potatoes, cheese—and I regularly skip meals without worrying about it. This flexibility extends to my sleep. If I drink a coffee late at night (which is rare), I’m still confident I’ll sleep eventually. If I need to give my kids melatonin on a long flight, I’ll do it to help them rest, but I don’t depend on external aids long-term. It’s all about balance and flexibility.

7. Reducing Mental Clutter

I learned meditation as a teenager. If I have thoughts—plans, worries, recent events—I acknowledge them and let them go. Then I observe my emotions until I’m calm. Eventually, I tune into my basic senses: my heartbeat, my breath, what I see, smell, taste, and feel. Sometimes I imagine leaving my body, going into space, thinking back to the formation of the universe, and then returning. This perspective makes everyday problems feel small. By the end, I’m at peace and ready for sleep.

8. Light, Noise, Temperature

I don’t worry about blue light or screens. I can be on my laptop until 1 a.m. and still sleep by 1:10. Noise doesn’t bother me too much either—I’ve slept through city sounds, airplanes, and more. Temperature, though, can be a factor. It’s unpleasant to wake up sweating or freezing. I recall trying to sleep in near-zero-degree Celsius temperatures in Yellowstone and Grand Teton National Parks without proper gear. Most people would probably agree that a cool room—around 18°C—with a comforter leads to great sleep. Still, I notice darkness really matters. I unplug alarm clocks, cover LEDs, and use dark blinds. Light seems to signal my body to wake up, while darkness promotes deeper rest. If there’s noise, I handle it calmly, sometimes asking others to lower it. Reducing stress around these factors, even if not eliminating them, makes a difference.